Always right

I am somewhat fascinated that no one is ever wrong. At least to them. Anyone who dares criticize or disagrees? Also wrong! Amazing!

An example:

Today at school, a teacher insisted that her students (intermediate grade level) did not under any circumstances need to know about ancient Rome or Mesopotamia. She felt like Abraham Lincoln was plenty. Why bog down curriculum with classical topics? The school, in her opinion (opinion? it's not fact?), needed to shake loose of the classical curriculum. I am sure she confided in me because she was pretty sure I would agree. (Nope. I *want* my kids to learn about ancient Rome.) Although I didn't speak up, it disturbed me a bit. What would be wrong with a grade schooler learning about the establishment of civilization?

Another school-related example: Last year, some parents got upset about a "joke" in the yearbook. The two ladies who put the yearbook together did a lovely job, but they let that joke stay in. In fact, they approved on the grounds that it was funny. The parents put the principal in the middle. These teachers were fuming. How dare anyone question their judgment?

Question their judgment ... familiar theme ...

New example, same idea: Yesterday, I got into a little bit of a (how do I put this politely?) disagreement with my foster son's case worker tonight. I do not see her point of view; she definitely does not see mine. The topic is irrelevant. Suffice it to say, she is right. I am right. Wait a second ... we can't disagree and both be right!

I read recently on some education site somewhere that we study math and science topics that we will never use because it is part of the human quest for truth. (I read education sites because I have an EdM in progress that I am 95% done with but will probably never finish due to inertia. I am interested in education but hope to never end up in a classroom again. Long story.)

That word -- TRUTH -- ate at me, slowly but surely. What is truth? Do I always know the truth? (Obviously not!) Do I always want the truth? (Honestly, um, *cough*, no, I don't.) Then why on earth do I act like I'm always right?

Perhaps this is cultural. We all think we're right -- all the time. We can never stop to see another person's ideas as valid. And saying, "You're right," or "I'm sorry" is seemingly impossible. But did you ever notice that when that rare gem of a soul admits his faults, agrees with others, and occasionally changes his mind, he seems charming and humble? We like it when others can admit fault, a flaw in logic, or a malformed philosophy. They seem intellectually honest -- like they really do take the scientific method seriously enough to allow their conclusions to change when the data is challenged.

I refer here not to yes-men who go along with whatever to please or avoid an argument. I am describing the truly intelligent, honest, and humble among us who can say, "I never thought of it that way," or, "You really have a point there."

If we love to hear such from others, why don't we ever employ such comments ourselves? Perhaps we never have the opportunity, since we're so consistently correct. It's hard to admit you're wrong when you're never wrong.

Which is my point.

If you are reading this and finding yourself recalling multiple times that you have put yourself in someone else's place, seen it from another point of view, considered the adversary's perspective, or just plain said you're sorry, then please let me know -- I want to be your friend. Your humility is a gift, and I would love to learn from it, as I find identifying my own errors much more challenging than identifying those of others.

I come by it honestly; being right is the American way.